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Finally one slow day I asked her where she was from, Puerto Rico was the answer. We talked about life there a bit, then I asked her what brought her here. "MARIA!" was her sharp answer. I asked about it, she said it was a nightmare, she still wakes up at night if the wind blows hard. She said all that was left of the house by the time the middle of the storm was there were the concrete walls, the family huddled in corners to cut the wind and avoid flying things. She said (as of last fall) things were still in need of repair, so she was working here to send money home. She teared up so the conversation ended with some pleasantries. A few days later I asked her how things were going and she said terrible. Seems the park had some of the Servers staying at a small off site Motel, for which the park only pays half the room rate. Her room mate had moved out, because business was slow, her roommate found a job in the valley, now Andrea had to pay the full portion which meant less money to. That person is a sub. Of course there's a power exchange relationship!Nope, that does not necessarily follow. You do not automatically get power by being a dom; a submissive gives you that power. It's not yours by right. This is one of the basic cornerstones of consent--a submissive grants you power by consent, not by the simple virtue of being a submissive.Not every submissive wants the same things. Not every submissive interacts with a dominant in the same way. A wise and psychologically healthy submissive does not submit indescriminately to everyone who calls himself or herself a "dom." It is up to someone to choose to give you power, not up to you to take it.And you're not likely to get it if you walk around demanding that every submissive you see worships you. Nobody is entitled to automatic submission, Your Worshipfulness!First, get to know that person, even if briefly. Then, mutually decide whether and what kind of power relationship you have. Then, and only then, can you.
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